Pour Your Heart Out

i can update you with the fact that i know shes okay now, i checked if she was online and she currently is

 

Idk what to say








I'm just really stressed right now

 

- School is like a fruit, the longer it goes the worse it gets, use the time wisely while it's fresh to succeed in life.
- Gaming is like a society, as long it's running, people will come and go, make an impact or have fun before it slows down.

 

For y'all dealing with depression issues, I highly recommend turning to God. I can't imagine what life would feel like without believing in a God who loves you.

 

Very accurate. Started my 5th year in college and I can't seem to find the motivation to get things done. I remember when I would get home and grind out an essay rough draft and finish a math assignment before dinner. What happened? Where did my motivation go?

If you are able to get things done, challenge yourself so that you get ahead. Take AP classes or dual enrollment if your school offers them so you have less to do in college. The less time you take in school, the less likely you will be to run out of the drive to finish strong. That is, if you happen to feel this way. I know some people who have kept the same pace since middle school. We're all different of course.

 

spech - 100

 

no thanks, i prefer being an atheist

 

something about be open to change its good for you help people be better

 

for anyone who might be curious about my girlfriend who i posted about a few days ago; shes okay, but we havent talked for a few days because she most likely need some space for herself. if anyone who might be wondering about it in the future, ill post updated

 

aight hope she's fine

 

Alright, so I kind of like this girl. I don't think she likes me, but I don't know what to do to see if she likes me. I am a chicken so I won't ask her. Any advice?

Also, this girl and I are friends just if you are wondering.

 

be a sigma= u can pull anyone

 

I don't know what I'm even supposed to do
I'm seriously getting closer and closer to getting rid of myself
I'd go to therapy but I'd need to tell my parents about that, and my message to them (that I wanted to send to them, telling them all my problems about myself amd my mental state) is already 3000 words and it barely scratches the surface of what I want to say to them
I've spent the past 2 nights crying myself to sleep, I'm literally writing this after 30 minutes of crying and I can't stop
It's becoming harder and harder for me to stay happy at all with anything in my life, I'm trying to exist and I'm not even sure what I'm supposed to do anymore
Taking myself out of this world had been one option I've always thought about, although I never wanted to resort to it
It's times like this though that I fear I eventually won't be strong enough to stop myself

 

Get some help and just tell them. Doesn't have to be 3000 words just say I'm not in a good state and I need help

 

I'd say the best thing to do to get the best out of everything is to finish your letter to your parents, ask to start going to therapy and roughly explain why, while also requesting the first 1 or 2 or however many sessions you need be with your family too. This way you can bring the finished letter to those therapy sessions and it enlightens your parents to your situation, it allows your therapist to get an understanding of you, and over all, I think your message will get across a lot better.

 

I encourage you to just send your current message, or simply put just tell them you arent okay and that you need help from someone. Everything is gonna be okay, and if anything happens, I wanna be there like I was 2 years ago.

 

Im sorry dude. Whats already been said by them about sums it up, but I am truly sorry bro.

 

if u get rid of yourself here is what is going to happen: Your mother will wonder what she did wrong. Everyone who loves you will be sad. U have made an impact in your life and if u go you will leave so many people who love you behind. I would just explain to your family that u need to go to therapy. Even if its 3000+ words. then i would go. My grandpa left the earth a lil bit ago. All of us were sad asf. If you leave think about how sad other people would be. I hope you find something or someone that will help you.

 

I apologize, I hadn't logged in on this or my earthshine account on forums so I wasn't able to see this, I send them the message and had a sort of talk with my dad about it, although somehow I'm a bit disappointed at how it turned out, I wasn't told that my problems don't exist, but I feel that there wasn't as big of a reaction to it as I had expected, which just leads me to believe that it's not as big of a problem to them as I had thought it would be, which should be a good thing but just makes me feel like they aren't going to really care about it or offer any sort of help or anything, and I don't want to lean on them but it's kinda hard to stay in a positive mindset without help

my message was more of a rant and feelings dump, I worded it in a way to only send to my mom mostly, so I wasn't thinking about laying all my feelings out for a therapist to go over. I'm not opposed to a therapist, but I would not feel the most comfortable with family sessions, as I would feel like I'm bringing my parents down

I don't want to deprive you of the chance to help, if you'd like then add me on discord: Pham#3214
I've sort of started using a new account again, if you saw that guy named "ShamatoZ" in the main server, that's kind of an imposter and surprised people thought he was me
if I don't accept within a few days then I suppose I'd like you to know that it's not your fault, and I didn't avoid talking to you on purpose and take myself out because I didn't want to talk
I don't think I will do anything bad, but just wanted to tell you, just in case

It's ok, it's not your fault and really don't want you to feel bad over it

I know and it tears me up inside because it makes me feel like I'm suffering just to keep other people happy, and if I give in then I'm making people sad, even if their sadness is temporary



I really don't want to do anything bad to myself, so I want to update people who seem to care and want to know how I'm doing. I need to say it, if I don't respond within a few days, then I want to say I'm sorry for everything, and it's not that people here were bad at giving me advice, it's just that I couldn't take it anymore and I want everyone to stay positive through all the pain in their lives, always
I don't think that will happen, but I just want to say that regardless