Pour Your Heart Out

Update: My dad hates me now so, I'm living with my strict aunt. Surprisingly, She didn't beat like my birth mother did.

 

Is this for the car indecent?

 

yes.

 

Dang dude. I hope it's just the heat of the moment and your dad doesn't stay mad at you

 

Um.....This is the first time, I've viewed this... I don't know if it's still Ok to talk about things but,
When I was born my mom didn't care about me or my sister, she would leave us home alone with no food for days, about 4 years after living like that we went to an Orphanage and we stayed there for another 3 years, Then my mom was able to adopt us back and for the next year she beat us saying it was all our fault that she got in trouble. after that my grandparents came and took us, my mom hasn't called and anything since we were taken away.
(It feels weird talking to a bunch of strangers about this but I feel better because Today is my moms birthday)

 

Didn't you say you donk like your mom and now you feel good bc its her b-day?

 

hi again

 

sean go away. if you're going to talk, add value to the conversation.

 

the other day they were asking for advice, but no one has responded yet. I'm sure they are just checking in.
(read from here)
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\/

 

oops ok sorry SeanPeyton

 

:|

 

No I felt really crappy because it was my moms B-day and now I feel better because I've told people how I feel It doesn't really matter it's her b-day

 

didn't go the way I had hoped it would go.
guess I was never really deserved to have what I wanted for so long, just love from someone else.
I don't understand why, and I can't even do anything about it.
The only thing I want right now is to not be alive.
I'm planning on dying. Pretty soon if nothing changes. If I don't update anything, I'm killing myself on May 29th, or 30th.

definitely not the greatest way to spend my time.

 

Don't let your mom get to you, Like I said before "It doesn't matter what you are just have fun" - me. (If that is a quote I didn't search it up btw)

 

its okay dont be too sad. just consider it as a minor set back. whats important now is to gather your thoughts and simply try to see whats your next step. whether its to try again later or to keep going on with your life for a while before trying anything again. your best days are yet to come for sure. things arent always supposed to go smoothly. its all unexpected and a part of the future. as i always like to tell myself "madara(lol), you're still in the beginning of your life, things will not go your way, nor the way you completely want it. life will go the way its supposed to go whether i want it or not. try your best to make the perfect surroundings for the things you want to happen, it may happen, it may not. either way, you must keep going and seek the truth for all your actions. while enjoying life as well."
your mom will always be with you through thick and thin, but since what you told her was a very big deal for her, its currently not easy to process. she may accept it, she may not. eventually, you two will calmly discuss it together over a cup of tea. this is all a part of growing up. you just need to survive until you discover your true self and your goals. be patient as much as you can. you'll get through it. : )

 

Lovely paragraph, but lol "Eventually you "too" *two* will calmly discuss it "over a cup of tea" Lol

 

Oof. Unsure but ShamatoZ's case oddly reminds me of We are number one's.

 

I didn't remember, or at least know that he had the same case. Hopefully he hasn't been like me, and at least kept some of his hope to stay around I may not like him, but I would never wish for someone to die, no matter who they are.

 

I know this was posted in another thread, but I wanted to address it here instead of the ORG thread
I believe it is possible to have your account deleted? Not sure, you would need to ask Totoca12. But in general, your tracks are of a much higher quality than mine, and your skill in that area outshines mine by a huge margin. I believe that you have a good reputation, and I haven't noticed you receiving any hate in any ways.
I believe if it should be either one of us starting over, it's me. I'm perfectly willing to accept what I've become, and the truth of the situation, because I prefer the truth over all else, even if that means being worse off in the end.
I would really need a clean slate more out of the both of us. I have done some stupid things in the past, and I hate myself for what I did.
So don't give up, just keep on going. I know that many people appreciate your tracks for how they are, and I absolutely like every single one of them (remember the track that only I beat? If I didn't like it, I wouldn't have put up with it. That should be some proof that I like your work)

 

just say youre going to take a break on fluoride and come back on a new account. nobody has to know its you

 

Fluoride That is exactly what I did with this account. I got rid of everything that had to do with my past life here; all my contacts, all my friends, made the gmail inactive so I couldn't go back, etc. And just started over from the beginning. I've got to re-meet old friends and make new ones, do what little I can to be more involved in the community and make this place feel more at home because the truth of it is is that this is honestly one of the best community's I've ever been granted the pleasure of knowing. What I'm trying to say is that if you want to do that, go for it. And if it doesn't work out than you can always go back to fluoride and pick up right where you left off.