Coager Chronicles Issue 11

Welcome, Everyone, to the eleventh installment of the Coager Chronicles! The Coager Chronicles is an independent news source brought to you by yours truly.
This is where I bring to you the best updates for the most topical events of the FRHD forums.
And on today's chronicle I'm here to give a recount of one of the greatest love scandals the Free Rider Community has ever seen.


It all began February of 2020. Most people like to match the 2020 disaster of February with Australia's Wildfires, but that was nothing in comparison to the disaster that was RAPPERJACK's affiliation with Kate1. (Due to the recent name changes of some players, I will be referring to the player previously known as 'RAPPERJACK' as either 'retard' or 'dipshit' as it's the most accurate description of him and I can't be bothered to write out 'f.i.r.e.b.e.a.s.t'.
You could say that dipshit and kate1 had a relationship together. I wouldn't because it lasted like 4 days before Kate1 realized that retard is a cu.nt but that's besides the point.
Kate1 at the time was viewed as the most prestigious trophy wife anyone could have on the forums. So needless to say everyone was after her physically and romantically. It wasn't long until threads that retard made polluted the new posts with their poems and 'raps' and highly intellectual discussions about romance. Obviously, it wasn't long before people memed the sh.it out of it.

A small amount of users quickly jumped on the Kate1 bandwagon, spreading rumors that they were also in an intimate relationship with Kate1. People like Wano, Goodra, and Nhdtop were all after herm sending her flirtatious comments that either directly asked her out or even outright said that they were already together. Such claims could never be proven true but the same can be said for proving them false.

Editor's note: Goodra sent this directly to Kate1 which immediately resulted in her snitching on him to dipshit.


Editor's note: posted on public thread made by retard.


Editor's note: nhdtop bragging on the discord that Kate1 officially agreed to be his babe.

Sadly, both wano and goodra both failed in making Kate1 their frhd babe in the end, and there's reason to believe that nhdtop was the one who broke up with Kate1 soon after. But where three men fail, there's always one great man who will pull through.

The time has come for the introduction of Reborn, The Chad. Reborn is a long time member of Free Rider, and was forcefully inserted into the situation due to the manipulation of dipshit by Hotman7777.

Editor's note: sent straight to retard's PM's in order to create conflict.

Dipshit was mad at Reborn. He could let the other attempts by other people slide because he thought he had nothing to worry about seeing as he was more alpha than those three in his own eyes. But in a 1vs1 confrontation of masculinity he knew immediately he was outmatched by Reborn, so retard lashed out to play the victim before he could lose. And in doing so revealed the pathetic worm he was. Dipshit was losing chad points fast but he had no way to recover them. Reborn on the other hand showed his true kindness by posting this:

This single action caused Kate1 to fall head over heals for Reborn. His ability to show responsibility, respect and compassion where dipshit couldn't caused Kate1 to cheat on retard with Reborn.

Reborn's success in wooing Kate1 caused an uprising of attention seekers who attempted to succeed in the same thing. This caused many people to propose their own undying love for Kate1. But Kate1 only had eyes for Reborn at this point and all their attempts where futile as she pursued him. Reborn continued to not be a pedophile and would not engage with her but she never gave up. And to this day, rumour has it that she's still trying.

The events that transpired concluded near the middle of march meaning dipshit's relationship lasted all of 2 weeks before Kate1 realized she can do better than being with a loser like him. Goodra, Wano, and Nhdtop went on to achieve nothing for the rest of their lives and died in freak car accidents and were never heard from again.


Editor's note: accurate representation of what Retard and Reborn look like in real life.

And as it stands now, this is one of the biggest relationship feuds on the site. I'm not gonna link the threads it was in like I did with the JakeToCake chronicle because this one isn't locked and if anyone posts in it, it'll quickly get filled with sh.it posts that no one wants and everyone on the forums will have their brains rot while reading through it. And honestly if you ask me, I wish I was never around to see this in the first place.

This concludes the eleventh issue of the Coager Chronicles. Now since this is an independent project, I will be taking requests for future news stories that you, the viewer, would like to see covered. only good stories of course.
Keep in mind that these Chronicles are entirely factual.
Coager Chronicles are the proud sponsor of Official Ranked Ghosting.
And be sure to leave a comment about how much of a stupid bi.tch RAPPERJACK is.​

 

legend says that kate1 is nhdtop 's old babe

 

this is interesting

 

firebeast

laboob you stinking copycat

 

F.I.R.E.B.E.A.S.T

 

thank you for documenting one of the biggest scandals in FRHD history, I was on the edge of my seat reliving those tragic days. you played my emotions like a fiddle

 

maybe dipshit lost kate because dipshit used grid 15

 

i hate RAPPERJACK

 

I wish there was a way to know we are in the good old days before we've actually left them

 

LMFAO this is really funny tbh

 

I thought you left???

 

Read my status again

 

F.I.R.E.B.E.A.S.T :middle_finger:

 

Kate1

 

I’m not upset about this TBH this is honestly amazing XD I don’t even know half the kids in this tho so I’m playing try not to laugh while in class XD

 

Lol

 

don't act ignorant, you never forgot about me

 

Idfk you dumbass

 

LOL

 

All my homies hate rapperjack